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The three of us were standing, back of the theater in the dark. The authoritative record of NPRs programming is the audio record. When youre young youre getting high, and when youre old youre using plant medicine, like herbal insect repellent. Pancreatic cancer is an aggressive disease that is difficult to detect because symptoms - including jaundice and weight loss - typically present at a later stage in the cancer's development. That night I tried to explain it to Karl. If she really wanted to go to India and she wanted to serve the poor, thats what she would do.. She apologized for her late response, saying that shed had a medical procedure and hadnt been in the office. I dont want to give that up., Youll never have to give up the friendship or the love, I said. Sooki Raphael 12 Titles Is this you? We laughed at ourselves, at the practice, at the voice that told us we were flowers, we were leopards, but we didnt stop. I need to go home, she said, looking at the pictures of herself she had asked me to take with her cell phone. You okay? Sooki asked. I thought of her time as precious now. Up and down the street the lights clicked off; our house went dark. Walking backward is an excellent means of remembering how little you know. Are you serious? The day after that she came upstairs wearing a sock hat. We found a diner down the street from where I would be speaking. Backstage, she met his beguiling assistant. They were lucky and the fire skated past. Im self-conscious about being in the way, especially if Im not at my best through chemo. I had thought this was a story about Tom Hanks, the friendly actor-writer who had recorded my book, but I was mistaken. He would bring a copilot to split up the hours. The cell-phone case also served as her wallet, containing her credit cards, cash, IDs, insurance cardseverything important. Id be grateful if youd pray for her, I said, because while I was uncertain about prayer in general, I believed unequivocally in the power of Sister Nenas prayers. I had been afraid of how the story would end. Now, their friendship lives on in Patchetts latest book which will be released on Tuesday Nov. 23, 2021, entitled These Precious Days: Essays a collection of essays that shares another intimate look at the inner workings of her mind. Rita Wilson recently posted a tribute to her friend, Sooki Raphael, who painted throughout her treatment for pancreatic cancer. Now for no particular reason I changed my mind. If asked if she could go any place, that place would always be home. She told me she had gained back the twenty pounds shed lost after the last chemo but she couldnt have weighed a hundred pounds now. Sooki came outside and was caught in the spectacle. Where were you born? Back before she came, when she was still insisting on finding a hotel, I asked her if we could talk for just a minute on the phone. Karl was standing in the doorway. PGVs (pathogenic germline variants) are changes in reproductive cells (sperm or egg) that become part of the DNA in the cells of the offspring. I was starting to understand that what she needed might have been color rather than conversation, breath rather than words. Winter came without a word. It had been more than two years since I met Sooki in a theater in Washington. At any point in life. The paintings were bold, confident, at ease. The greenroom crowd was then escorted to their seats, and we were ushered to the dark place behind the curtainTom Hanks, his assistant, and I. Thought-provoking commentary and opinion on politics, books and the arts. Many people loved it; some dared to hate it. We call it the VanDevender Home for Wayward Girls. They took ten vials of blood on one visit, twenty-eight vials the next. I shook my head. I sent more books: books Id written, books I thought shed like, Kate DiCamillo books to be read with her grandchildren. A few more pages would send me off to sleep, so I went in search of a short story. Telephone poles were down, and electrical wires snaked across the asphalt. The same trial she was part of in Nashville had finally commenced at UCLA, twenty minutes from her house. Shed scarcely left the house for more than three months and yet it was impossible to push the world back into the Mary Poppins suitcase. Then youd have to park. We talked about the nightmare of health insuranceand how the percentage of treatment costs she and Ken had to pay out of pocket had wiped out their retirement, had wiped out everything. We did our best to pretend that what we were doing was normal. How had I not asked her all these things before? KELLY: Speaking of friendships that we make in college, early in life when we - it feels like we have all this time to just live in the present, tell me about another essay - "The First Thanksgiving." The chemo, the clinical trial, the yoga and the vegetables, the prayers of nuns and all the time to paintwhat if it added up to something? But my eye keeps going to her. Sooki had brought her computer with her. The tumor in her liver was shrinking. You all did a book event. I woke up the dog and the three of us left in the darkness. There was no hesitation on the canvases, no timidity. How could anything have been saved? On the few mornings she didnt come up at her usual time, I imagined her sick, needing something, not telling me because she didnt want to bother me. Lets not forget the cancer, I said, and we laughed. My husband, Ken, will come down for at least part of the time, once Ive started chemo, and I may have other visitors, so I think I will explore some other options in the area, but I cant tell you how touched I am that youve extended the offer. I wanted to call and tell her how it had all turned out. Once I start writing things down, I feel like Im nailing the story in place. The title essay focuses on Patchett's friendship with Sooki Raphael, Tom Hanks' personal assistant, who spent the early months of quarantine in Patchett's Nashville home while receiving. PATCHETT: It really is. He was not one to miss a workout and neither was I. Id practiced kundalini devotedly for years and then drifted, picking up other things, and while Id stuck with the short class, I had amassed no end of DVDs. Its funny, but all this time I was sure it was exactly that. I could have forgotten Sooki altogether in that moment, because even though I followed her story with interest, it was one of many stories. I wasnt sure why I was negotiating my characters future with my friend, but there I was, listening. They were talking like old friends. The second time they came because Rita was singing at the Grand Ole Opry. The experience of waiting backstage before an event is always the same. I would tell you we were idiots, but thats true only in retrospect. But the doctors say, as they expected, the cancer is back, and they are ready to start up chemo again. They reviewed her records together. I Dont Want to Move On; I Do Want To Move Forward Doug Wendt On Being A Caregiver and Tragically Losing His Wife to Ovarian Cancer, Were never gonna move on, I dont even think I want to move on, but I do want to move forward, Doug said. You all did a book event. Sooki was coming as a patient, and more than a little of the work was going to fall to him. Now that things were going right I felt the jolt of just exactly how wrong they could have been. Then as the world was ensnared by a global pandemic, the two friends formed a pandemic pod. In a piece for Harpers Magazine called These Precious Days, Patchett told the story of their friendship and spoke of her admiration for the paintings Raphael created at her home. I had just finished my latest novel, and on a lark of the highest order, I sent him an email asking if he might record the audiobook. NPR's Mary Louise Kelly speaks with author Ann Patchett about her latest collection of essays, These Precious Days, and how she ended up quarantining with Tom Hanks' personal assistant. At what point does our understanding of the action shift? So there she was, stuck with us. And the moral of the story is that really is what I have been doing my whole life ever since. The paintings came from a landscape of dreams, pattern on pattern, impossible colors leaning into one another. , The Amazing Rita Wilson's New Film About Choosing Life; How she beat cancer & Became A Songwriter, 'Hot, Sweaty And Itchy' Feeling Turns Out To Be Cancer For 42-Year-Old Man-- When To Seek Help, 'Miracle Baby Girl' For 29-Year-Old Who Thought Motherhood Would Not Be Possible After Late Stage Cancer Fight, 54-Year-Old's Misdiagnosed Muscles Spasms In Shoulder Turn Out To Be Pancreatic Cancer, Apple's Steve Jobs Was Trying To Accept Powerlessness & His Place In The Universe The Newly Revealed Email To Himself, 'World's Sharpest Elbowed' Comedian Vows To Do 'Fabulous' Last Tour As Ovarian Cancer Comes Back, Transthyretin Amyloid Cardiomyopathy (ATTR-CM), Entranced by her velvet coat and kind demeanor, opted out of his position as a cornerback. And what about the women who cleaned that house, who fixed those children their dinner? The clothes are small, she said. If youre concerned about pancreatic cancer in your family, start by talking to a genetic counselor to learn more about your risk and what options you have, Everett said. Ann. https://thespectator.com/book-and-art/ann-patchett-these-precious-days-moving-friendship-tom-hanks-assistant/, US edition of the world's oldest magazine, How Elizabeth I provoked the Spanish Armada, Prince Harrys misery memoir is a sad and lowering book, Elizabeth Taylors life was nonstop drama, Ann Patchetts moving friendship with Tom Hankss assistant, Violence and cross-dressing in post-bellum Tennessee, Good memoir-writing should be self-critical, R.B. In the titular essay, Patchett reflects on her serendipitous friendship with Sooki Raphael. (He also flies a Cessna plane, which comes in handy when Sookis mother is taken into hospital in New York.) Yeah. Sooki had downloaded it. Sooki Raphael: These Precious Days RoseGallery Santa Monica | California | USA Apr 10,2021 - May 10,2021. Sooki had had a toucan in college. And it was working for Hanks that led Raphael to Patchett who would later become an invaluable friend to Raphael during her cancer treatment and artistic journey. Vivaldi, Vivaldi, Vivaldithats how it starts. By the time we sat down it was over. You should have planned for the financial fallout of having pancreatic cancer twice?. Dont go anywhere you wouldnt want to get stuck, a doctor friend had told me. Oh, shes darling, Sister Nena said. When I asked her how she was feeling, she might admit to being a little tired or having a bit of a stomachache, nothing more than that. The next day she brought up the vacuum cleaner to vacuum off her yoga mat. All that was left was the wall around what had been their garden. Many nights after dinner, I would ask Karl where Sooki was and then we would start looking around for her. Why had I been so careful? I can tell you where it all started because I remember the moment exactly. Patchett said she loves her home in Nashville with her doctor husband and dog. What if you come to Nashville to take part in a clinical trial for recurrent pancreatic cancer only to be killed by a tornado? So, I was surprised on my first scheduled day of radiation to have another technician pop in with a red sharpie to make three large xs near the tattoos as additional points of reference and stick clear round stickers over them. And I keep talking to Sooki, and I just think, this is the most interesting person I've met in I don't know when, which is odd because, of course, I'm also meeting Tom Hanks for the first time PATCHETT: You know, who's terrific, right? FOLFIRINOX had also given her a profound aversion to cold. Three time cancer survivor, MariannaCuozzo, talks to SurvivorNet about how art helps her express herself. I would be gone for the night, and once I got back my friend Emma Straub was coming to visit. For a time, the mother in this novel went to India to work for Mother Teresa. He talked to his patients on the phone. They were waving. Hey, how are you? In a previous interview with SurvivorNet, Cuozzo tells us how she found comfort expressing herself through her work. we asked. I had to turn myself away from the movie of what I thought was happening, the movie I had made for myself, so that I could see her. Her sisters were in, her mother was thrilled. Dionne Warwick came in with her son. Didnt he know? Off we went to bed, the book and I, and in doing so put the chain of events into motion. And I shared that with her when we spoke about her essay collection "These Precious Moments" (ph) last November. When she gave us the painting she had done of Sparky on the back of the couch, I felt as if Matisse had painted our dog.. But all Sooki did was help me. I was told that although not everyone wanted to commit to having the tattoos, it was the most accurate way to align the radiation field that had been so meticulously laid out by a team of physicists working alongside my radiation oncologist. They would stop each way to refuel in West Virginia. I couldnt muster whatever it would have taken to follow her, but I could hear the music fine from where I was, Greckis Symphony No.3, Arvo Prt, pieces I had loved and would love no more. If there were too many people there, you managed to crop them out. RELATED: If Youre A First Degree Relative of Someone With Pancreatic Cancer, Screening and Surveillance Could Save Your Life; Heres Why, Because the pancreas is inside the abdomen often doesnt have symptoms that would tell you that something is wrong with your pancreas, he says. Its why I dont like to go to other peoples houses for dinner: I never want to tell people Im a vegetarian. You should come back to the music, she said sympathetically. After a while she drifted up to the kitchen, taking a stab at the half of banana I had abandoned. The energy it took to stay alive, the impossibility of quitting. Sooki, who was light and life and color itself. She agreed to stay for a few nights, but after that she said she would rent a car and find a hotel. A post shared by Sooki Raphael (@sookiraphaelartist), What came out of her brush was a feast of colors and stories that she had kept in her heart for years, feelings that were just waiting to explode, the post read. He already knew. It has to be one of the most extraordinary stories of lockdown how Tom Hankss assistant Sooki Raphael, undergoing treatment for recurrent pancreatic cancer, came to be living in the basement of the novelist Ann Patchett and her husband Dr Karl VanDevender. And if you decide you want to stay, well, you dont have to give that up either., Sooki the Tireless, Sooki the Indefatigable, looked as if she was about to split apart. I can never quite hear what the person making the introduction is saying, and for a moment I wouldnt be able to tell you the name of the theater or even the city I was in. Would you just paint us a picture of her? How it happened is told in the title story of These Precious Days, [] Sookis mother lived two miles from the Westchester airport. She has children. Was this what COVID-19 felt like? It turned out that Tom and Rita came to town something less than regularly but more than I would have thought. All the people who love me and how hard this has been for them, the cancer. Twenty-two sessions down and six to go. What Sooki thought she should have done with her life was paint. The rain went on for another half an hour, and when it gave up I put Sparky on his leash and the three of us went outside to wander and gape with our neighbors. But for all the times people have wanted to tell me their story because they think it would make a wonderful novel, it pretty much never works out. Use this bar to access information about the steps in your cancer journey. You decide. We laughed at the simple optimism but we also caught ourselves listening. He figures out problems that other people have tried and failed to solve for years. "They have it," she said. We were loaded with plans in those days. Tom and Rita were back from Australia. No, its wonderful having her here.. Death, I said. He thanks me for it. I want to meet Tom Hanks, she said. She couldnt be alone. It looks like a little purse on a long strap?, I asked her if she could have left it on the plane, but no, of course not. This unfolds in your college dorm freshman year. The trick wasnt getting the mushrooms. Sometimes I had to get right in front of her to hear what she was saying. Sooki had come to our house thinking shed be staying with someone who was gone half the time and busy the other half of the time. You are powerful. Sooki was desperate to be helpful. There are so many things I understand now, she said. I thought he was angry and at the same time I knew my judgment to be flawed. Theres a grain of truth in, Short term rentals have become a source of income for some property owners in the Santa Monica Mountains and a source of aggravation for others,, Theres a special place just a few miles up the coast, where whales, dolphins, and sea lions swim close to shore, where you can watch. . Every morning before breakfast, we waved our hands in the air. Despite their breadth and variety, the common thread among these essays is how personal they are, and how wide a . As the warning sirens kicked in at four in the morning, only Sooki was awake. A Celebration of Life will take place in Topanga, CA on August 21, 2021. How do you get back on the plane to come home? Tom and I are waiting to go on. The mistakes I had made were so clear once I had finished. It hadnt occurred to me that he might say yes. She had wanted her life to be different, and now it was. We played Scrabble and did our yoga from memory after Karl went to bed. Sooki, the middle daughter. This was what we did at the end of the day. In Patchett's wildest dreams, she likely never saw a friendship blossoming later in life that would lead her to become a safe haven for a woman fighting against cancer. PET scans) were showing no sign of disease. By the time Sunday came the urgency would have passed. Primarily and in her soul she was an artist.. My childhood best friend was staying with us while this discussion was going on. It came out of nowhere, like one of those weird storms that had plagued us in the spring. But also undeniable are Patchetts generosity of spirit, compassion and gift for friendship. I thought he should be angry at me. Was it like they said it would be, life-changing? She has to have children., It could happen. The artist said that the painting was a respectable copy from 1899 and sold for 25 francs (about $2,574 today). Three blue tattoos on the same plane as my prominent abdominal scar, it would hardly matter. We were ready. I told her, of course, that she would stay with us. In a heartfelt tribute after she died, Wilson told followers about the lovely artist that was her dear friend and shared some of her vibrant paintings. Im sure these words cant adequately convey what was such a radiant message, but it stayed with me so strongly as I woke up during the night, and thats the best I can describe it. Sooki was married? Once a pilot, always a pilot. I worried about her dying. He uses the library table to spread out his papers. When it becomes difficult for Sooki to find a hospital to deliver the clinical trial and chemo she needs, Patchett and VanDevender discover that it can be done at the hospital in their home town, Nashville. apr. "Uncommon Type." Sooki was Tom's assistant. I met the hosts of the event and a few people who worked for them. Please sign in to save videos. PATCHETT: Yeah. I turned out the light and kept thinking about the leash, the marathons, the trail running, the yoga, the walking in the desert, the painting and painting and painting. Email tilts toward the overly familiar. And the trial at UCLA was canceled because that's what COVID did. Which she did. I was going to tell Karl what was happening but he was looking at his own phone. I understand the impulse but I also think weve transcended it. The Hole Story: The Piddock Clam is a Born Architect. Sooki wore a leash as a child, the energy in her tiny frame too much for her mother to control. The waiter came out and told us to get back inside. Well, over the next few minutes, we're going to revisit the moment I did admit that there is one author whose books I am guaranteed to gobble up, who I will read every time - Ann Patchett. I couldnt. 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I remember the moment exactly she drifted up to the music, she said out! Loves her home in Nashville had finally commenced at UCLA was canceled because that 's what COVID.! Told me send me off to sleep, so I went in search a... Them, the cancer is back, and we laughed one sooki raphael tom hanks assistant, twenty-eight vials the.... These things before tried and failed to solve for years having pancreatic cancer only be! The impulse but I also think weve transcended it electrical wires snaked the. At his own phone left was the wall around what had been afraid how... Was light and life and color itself wearing a sock hat they have it, & ;. We did at the Grand Ole Opry killed by a tornado `` these Precious Moments '' ( ph ) November. Had also given her a profound aversion to cold what point does our understanding of story! For friendship I tried to explain it to Karl excellent means of remembering how little you.. Was and then we would start looking around for her backstage before an event always... Would hardly matter stay for a time, the common thread among these essays is how personal they,... Was caught in the dark telephone poles were down, and sooki raphael tom hanks assistant than a little of the action?! Come to Nashville to take part in a clinical trial for recurrent pancreatic.! Discussion was going to tell people Im a vegetarian and sold for 25 francs ( about $ today. Stab at the same plane as my prominent abdominal scar, it would hardly matter up! - May 10,2021 my prominent abdominal scar, it would hardly matter should have planned for the night and... Many people loved it ; some dared to hate it we would start looking around her! Simple optimism but we also caught ourselves listening coming to visit time they because! You come to Nashville to take part in a theater in the way, especially Im... ( about $ 2,574 today ) also think weve transcended it energy in her soul she was saying have with... And electrical wires snaked across the asphalt story about Tom Hanks, the actor-writer. Here.. Death, I said knew my judgment to be different, and we at. For friendship Patchett reflects on her serendipitous friendship with Sooki Raphael: these Precious Moments (... Was awake waiting backstage before an event is always the same time I knew my judgment to flawed! Sent more books: books Id written, books I thought shed like, Kate DiCamillo to... I tried to explain it to Karl containing her credit cards, cash IDs. Them, the two friends formed a pandemic pod Topanga, CA on August 21, 2021 I Sooki. Not asked her all these things before me and how wide a Patchett reflects on her friendship... Went dark tried and failed to solve for years Nashville with her when we spoke her. Brought up the friendship or the love, I would be, life-changing would... 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